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Does Paying on a First Date Pay Off?

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This is a topic that I feel has been long awaited, due to many conversations I have had with different people, who all seem to have different views on this. Now most women like to be treated like a lady and with respect but, in this day and age, should this still go as far as a man paying for everything on a date? I decided to carry out some research on this subject to see what the majority think about this and also why some people still feel that men should take the lead with the bill.

There was a time, when Men and Women weren’t viewed as equals, and Women were expected to stay home and tend to the house and children, while the men went out to work and earned the money. Therefore, it was natural that the man would pay for an evening out, as they were the ones with the cash. However, we have come a long way since this. Most women are now earning money as well, in similar and in some cases, better paid jobs than the men they are with. So why do some people still feel a man should pay?

I began my research by looking at statistics online. According to an article in The Mirror newspaper, after carrying out a poll on 1,000 Brits (500 men & 500 women) on this, the diner’s club tastecard found that: “1 in 4 women expect a man to pay the bill on a date. Those aged between 25 and 34 are the most demanding, with 27% insisting their date should pay for dinner and for all drinks. Those aged between 18 and 24 are least demanding, with just 17% expecting their date to pay the whole bill. The average across all ranges is 24%, with 62% saying they would expect to go Dutch and split the bill. Altogether, a total of 63% of the men quizzed said they would expect to pay the entire bill.” This research alone shows how much of a split opinion there is on this issue.

When speaking to some of the women I know about this issue, they felt that a man should pay for the first date, as it shows he is a gentleman and they felt that it was tradition. Some of them also said that if a man didn’t pay, this would put them off enough to not meet with them again. Other women I spoke to said that they would like the man to offer, but that they would always protest and go halves, but would like the offer to be made. Out of the men I spoke to, some said they would always offer as this was the right thing to do and showed good manners, while the others said that they would like to go halves but felt awkward when the bill came, about how to suggest or handle the issue.

Even after carrying out my research, I found this very difficult to conclude due to the very varied opinions on this. However, to the women, I would advise if you are working, ask yourself why you want the man to pay, and if he does offer, maybe offer to buy the first/next round of drinks in return. To the men, I would say, unfortunately for you, there are a lot of women who still like a man to pay on first dates. Therefore, if you really like the person, ask yourself if you like them enough to pay for their meal. If you don’t want to pay the whole bill, you may fall lucky and find someone who is happy to go halves, but be prepared for them to be washing their hair when you want a second date, if this is something that they see as important and tradition!

Written by: Liz Harwood